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Are The “Shoulds” Getting You Down?

June 11, 2009 By Bonnie Marcus

As women, we are continuously striving for work/life balance because we believe it’s possible. All the subject matter experts (myself NOT included) tell us that we can achieve balance in our lives and we should make every effort to create this equilibrium for ourselves. It is doable.

We are all superwomen. As a result, we have an ongoing list of things we “should” do for our career and our family/personal life. We seem to punish ourselves with this list of “shoulds”. The “shoulds” contribute to our guilt on a daily basis and we often give more focus to what we “should” have done or “should ” do instead of everything we have accomplished.

I propose that we create a different type of list; a list of things that we choose NOT to do. This new approach is a powerful guilt-free antidote to the “shoulds” for we are CHOOSING not to do the things on the list. I choose NOT to volunteer to make brownies for the class picnic. I choose NOT to do the laundry before work this week. I choose NOT to stay late at work one night a week.  I will NOT have the dinner party this weekend.

So many of our “shoulds” actually add very little value to our lives. Take a look at your list and  see if you agree. So why do we persist on focusing on them everyday?

Let’s try to let the “shoulds” go. Take back your power and intention and focus on your accomplishments and success. Don’t beat yourself up with guilt. Try a new approach and create a list of what YOU CHOOSE NOT TO DO.

The choice is yours!

Bonnie Marcus

Bonnie Marcus is a Certified Executive Coach. With 25 years of sales and management experience, Bonnie has an extensive business background that includes VP of Sales at several national companies as well as CEO of a national healthcare company. She has held executive positions in startup companies and Fortune 500 companies. As the founder and principal of Women’s Success Coaching, Bonnie’s specialty is helping women in business achieve success and maximize their potential. She assists women with promoting themselves effectively in order to advance their careers and grow their businesses. Bonnie is well known for her motivational speaking and innovative workshops.

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Filed Under: Female Entrepreneurs, Female Executives, Personal Development, Women On Business Tagged With: Add new tag, guilt, work/life balance, working mothers

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